Terrible Two's

Having been a mom of a two year old for 4 whole months now, I've learned a few things, made some mistakes, had my patience tested, and grown a lot. I've also come to the conclusion that two year olds get a bad rap.

Often they are expected to behave in ways they just haven't learned how to yet and are looked down upon for their "bad behavior" when they just haven't had the chance to learn otherwise. For a two year old, it's just not fair. Allow me to explain.

Two year olds feel emotion very honestly, immediately, and intensely. They truly don't know any different. Up to this point they've just not had that many experiences to teach them how to deal with emotions. I think as adults it's hard for us to understand why they get so upset over such seemingly small things. I have to laugh (on the inside of course) every time I see someone who has never had a two year old, act shocked at anything they do. I bet if they took a second to think about it they'd find their behavior isn't much different.

Ty can get upset pretty quick when someone takes his toy. As adults we think what's the big deal, it's a toy car, here just play with another one. But Ty wants THAT car! He had it first and it's his. Crying usually ensues with some possible screaming and perhaps even throwing himself on the floor.

Now imagine yourself in this same situation. Let's say someone comes up and gets in your car and starts driving away. I can imagine some of those same emotions might surface. Crying, screaming, running after the person who took your toy. You might even kick and fight to get it back. What if when the police arrive to help you and they say, oh just take this other car and you'll be fine. I can imagine you'd be saying "But I want THAT car! It was mine!". Same way a two year old feels about his car. Yes, it's that big of a deal.

Two year olds get grumpy when they are sick, tired, hungry, or bored. I know some adults whose behavior is not much different when they are feeling out of sorts. And sometimes even worse. I think two year olds are much more innocent because they just haven't developed the ability to reason, to understand that sharing is not a permanent situation and that there are other feelings to consider other than your own.

Ty has an amazing vocabulary and has taught me so much as he shares his feelings. I'll never forget the time out of frustration I begged him to stop crying only to have him say "Mom I'm really trying but I just can't." Or another time when I said Ty we don't cry over that and he said "But Mom I want to cry." Sometimes I can't stop crying at the drop of a hat either. And sometimes we all just want to cry.

Two years old is the year of teaching. And I think it takes that long, a whole year, and just as much patience. I can tell it's going to be a year of growth for both of us. A year of patiently, lovingly, firmly, and kindly showing Ty how to react and behave. A year of feeling like it's not sinking in at all. A year of showing unconditional love, unending patience, and unyeilding support to my sweet boy who is in one of the biggest learning phases of his life so far.

On the other hand it's going to be a year of discovery, growth, and joy. He's more fun than he's ever been. He makes us laugh constantly and I can't even put into words what it's like viewing life through him. It's like we're discovering life all over again every day. It's completely awesome.

I hope I can teach him well. I know I'm not perfect. I already have and will continue to make mistakes. But I will always do my best, and I feel great about that. I love you my sweet two year old boy!

This week we took Ty to an interactive movie at the library. It was very cute. They showed The Incredibles. Each child got a bag full of goodies and props that they used at different points throughout the movie. A mask to wear, a whistle to blow, a sign that says "boo" to hold up for the bad buys, a hershey kiss to eat whenever Mr. Incredible kisses Mrs. Incredible and so on.....

He loved it and continued to wear his incredible mask for the rest of the night and the entire next day....Two year olds are pretty incredible. Especially my own!